There was something about that moment when, as I sat on the bed and you went to your knees before me, no pushing, no asking, just naturally kneeling there before me.
The was something about that moment as I looked you straight in the eye, as you lowered your gaze and gently whispered "I want to be yours".
There was something about that moment I gripped your hair in a tightening fist and bought your mouth to meet my own, kissing you, tasting you, biting your lip as I felt it swell with each bite, with each kiss, with every moment I devoured your mouth.
There was something about that moment - that moment as I removed the belt from your trousers. as my mind and body flooded with a multitude of feelings that I wanted to hurt you. That moment when you knew what my mind was thinking. When you knew what I wanted and yet it was far from what you wanted and yet, it was that moment that you offered yourself to me.
There was something about that moment when you looked at me and your words screamed "I trust you" that moment when your words so simple made a statement so big it not only took my breath away, it filled my heart with a sense of warmth and sent a longing soaring through my body straight to the depths of me.
There was something about that moment.
It's where it has all truly begun.
"In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those peple who rekindle the inner spirit" Albert Schweitzer
I am.
Thankful.
I am also excited.
The flame has been lit, but not only has it been lit, it is burning brightly, strongly. Quite unxpectedly.
I am thankful for the person who has rekindled MY inner spirit.
For not only has that spirit been rekindled but what was a few months ago a simple connection, a beginnings of a new friendship has been rekindled too.
I am thankful to feel all that it brings to me.
I hear his voice, his words.
I see his submissive need, his vulnerability and it draws me in, it fans the flames. I see his longing and I find myself drawn to wanting to hurt him. Not just physically, but in a way that I need - emotionally.
I find myself wanting to reach in to his heart, twisting it, turning it and then soothing away the hurt that my beast, my need has caused him. It has been a very very long time that someone has quite touched my beast in this way, has touched me in this way.
He has rekindled the inner spirit. He has awoken my beast.
The flames are burning. How they wil burn time will tell. How big the flames will grow we cannot tell the future. But, my inner spirit has been rekindled, it is burning, brightly.
And I am feeling so many things right now.
And for that, I am thankful!
