Something I have told the boy right from the very beginning.
The boy often says that he never knows what to expect, and then even if at times he has expected certain things, he has been left bewildered when they haven't come to fruition.
As I say to him often, always expect the unexpected.
It is how it should be. The boy should never become complacent, he should never think that he will know what is coming his way.
He should also know that I am and will always be at least one step ahead of him. That there are so many things that he says, even without saying them. That there are many things that he gives away without even realising it.
So, it was unexpected to the boy yesterday when he was given permission to edge more than once. The boy has his own version of events which you can read on this link HERE.
As is clear, from all of the entries in the boys blog and also ones I have made here in my own, the boy is going through extended denial. In that I have total control of what he does, when he orgasms ( which in this case isn't often!), and if or when or where it happens. It is for me, the control of it all that meets my needs, and it also meets my sadistic needs in seeing the boy suffer, hearing him scream in frustration, and it also gives me the chance to tease . . .and deny . . .and tease some more.
So, the boy hasn't been allowed to touch or orgasm for a while.
I gave the boy the opportunity to edge when he went shopping last week, and the fact that he went into the toilets at the supermarket, took out my cock and edged in the cubicle just goes to show the levels of desperation of the boy, the fact that he will go to such depraved lengths to edge, to touch.
(You can read about the boys reflections of that ~ including pics on this link HERE )
And it has become clear that the boy will do almost anything regardless of the risk, regardless of how potentially humiliating to be able to touch.
It just goes to show the way desperation can make someone do anything, things they wouldn't normally do. And it is this, in the sense of D/s that I love, the fact that the submissive will do almost anything to please, that the need to please will push the limits that may be in place, that it will push the boy to do almost anything for release ~ and that is the joy of chastity and denial.
So, I decided that yesterday, we would see just whether we can push those limits, to see just how desperate the boy is to touch, to edge, regardless of where it may be.
Both of us at work, we'd been in touch by text during the day. The boy advised me he would be leaving work soon and I told him that he can edge before he reached home. I wondered just where the boy would do it, and despite the risk of being seen, being caught, the boy stopped in a layby on the edge of the road, and edged in the car. As he writes himself in the blog,
its also funny, that, something that was quite apparent when the boy pulled over, with the closeness, of passing vehicles, turned into an insignificance, once he had only one thing on his mind, he didn't care, he could have had people staring in through the windows, he wasn't interested, her cock, and reaching the edge, and her instruction was all that mattered to the boy, end of.
And it is that focus, that I like.
That the need of him to do as instructed comes before and above anything else, regardless of the consequences, regardless of what it may mean.
And it is that control that I like.
It is knowing that the boy will do whatever he has to, to follow instructions, to do as he is told, and to please. It is knowing that the submissive need, the need to please comes above, beyond anything else.
Such submission is a beautiful thing.
It is a powerful thing.
It is MY thing!
Knowing that he would be out walking for 20 minutes and that the clamps would bite, would hurt, and that with every step he would feel it.
And I knew that when he took them off the pain would bite even more.
It did exactly that.
Now, I LOVE nipple torture.
I LOVE nipple clamps.
I think that they are just so simple, but wow, they can have such an effect, for something so small to be able to cause such pain, such torture, and to bring such feelings of submission. They are one of my favourites.
And still it wasn't over for the boy.
Before dinner, I gave him permission to edge again.
The sole purpose of making my denial of him even more felt, something to add and continue to build his levels of frustration. There is always a plan to the things that I do. I always know what I intend to happen and what I am doing and why I am doing it.
And, when we spoke later on the phone, I decided that we would use the clamps again. Again, he wasn't expecting it. But then as I started with the opening words of the blog ~ always expect the unexpected!
However, the boy couldn't find the clamps.
And so, he had to go off and find them, I gave him two minutes.
And I know just what having a timing can do.
It makes you panic, thinking that oh my god, what is going to happen if they aren't found, where are they and no matter how hard you look you can't find them. I know from my own experience in the past, what that panic feels like, to have a certain length of time to find something and then not being able to. I laughed at the boy, I could sense his panic, I could hear him getting frustrated because he couldn't find them, I could hear him cursing and throwing things around trying to find them. And the more he was panicking the more I was quietly laughing to myself.
He finally found them. Out of time. Too bad.
So, instead of them being attached to his nipples, I made him attach one to the foreskin of my cock and the other clamp to one of his balls. Hearing the pain he was in, just made me laugh at him. My sadistic side really does come out at times, and it grows all of the time with the boy.
"You really are sadistic Mistress"
*laughs* "Am I?"
Am I sadistic?
Yes. I think I probably am.
When the boy told me that the clamp on his ball wasn't hurting that much, I made him switch it to his nipple, the other still attached to the foreskin of my cock. I made him pull on the chain. Hearing him suffer. Hearing his breathing change. Hearing quite clearly the pain the boy was feeling.
"It hurts" the boy whimpered.
I responded with no sympathy and accompanied by another laugh. I do like to laugh at the boys suffering, hearing him in pain, knowing that I am causing that pain even if by instruction rather than physically. I told the boy that he can leave them there until I orgasm. And then just to torture him even more, I stopped what I was doing.
The realisation came to the boy that while I had been "playing", that I had stopped just so he would endure the pain and the discomfort for longer.
"Mistress has stopped"
"Indeed I have"
I finally give in and allow the boy to remove them. Hearing the pain he is in when he does, just makes me feel even more sadistic. It makes me want to hurt him all the more. And the boy knows it too.
"You would pull so much harder wouldn't you Mistress?"
As if the boy really needs to ask that question LOL except, the boy has unleashed a hidden beast within me. The hidden beast that is my sadism. The need I have to hurt the boy. It grows constantly. It is just like a hidden beast, prowling awaiting to be let out.
Always expect the unexpected, because there's no knowing when the beast (or anything else for that matter) may appear!