18 March 2011

"You need a sub/slave . . . "

If I had a £ for everytime someone says to me "You need a sub or slave" I would be one very rich dominant woman. 

I hear it countless times when I mention that I am doing any number of domestic chores, when I mention that I have had to do anything from the gardening, to cleaning the car, to making a cup of tea. 

It seems that "some" believe that a sub or slave is the answer but seem locked into this fantasy thinking that Dominant women shouldn't be doing such things.  Oh if there was no such thing as "real life" as the "daily grind" then I am sure that we wouldn't be . .that I wouldn't be but . . .daily life is real, it does include the daily grind and as such it means that there are things that need doing . . .that have to be done regardless of our "persuasion", regardless of who we are.

And it maybe the case that having a houseboy, a service sub/slave would indeed make life easier, would indeed free up so much of my time that I could then focus that time on the relationship and dynamic, but it is getting to that point which is something that takes time, that takes care and isn't something which can ever be so simple as the words "you need a sub or slave"

Why is it that some, think that I shouldn't be doing these things? 

Being Dominant doesn't mean that you go through life without doing these things.

It doesn't mean that I am not capable of doing it, in fact I am more than capable of doing it all, that as a single parent I am totally used to doing it all.  It isn't a case of needing someone to do it. 

Doesn't mean to say it wouldn't be bliss not to have to do it all, doesn't mean that life wouldn't "benefit" from having a service sub, "slave" or any other title you want to give someone.  It doesn't mean that having someone to do these things wouldn't make things a whole lot easier . . .it would.

Yes I may want one. Yes I may desire one.

But do I need one for "domestic" reasons?

No. I don't need. 

Like? Desire? Yes maybe so . . .

If only it were that simple eh? 

Unfortunately, for those who live in the real world, we know all too well that it is not an easy answer, we know all too well that it isn't as easy as just "getting a sub or slave".  

I don't just want a submissive to do the ironing. I don't just want a submissive to clean the car or bring me tea in the mornings . . .the whole dynamic, the whole relationship is so much more than that, but to get to that whole much more takes time, and when you don't have a lot of time in life, it can be a viscious circle at times.

But, I know what I want.

I know what I don't. 

And yes I may need a sub.

But I need a whole lot more besides and that is what makes it less than easy, because I know that what I want isn't what many do want.  Although I read so many blogs of submissive men wishing their OH was dominant, wishing they would take on the "lead" in an FLR and it seems the submissives that I cross paths with, like the fantasy but not the reality, or do not want to take their submissive beyond the threshold of the bedroom. 

And I want and need more than that. And I want and need someone who wants and needs this just as much as I do.

Otherwise it doesn't work.

It just isn't that simple as "you need a sub".

1 comment:

  1. I really understand the dynamics you look for. I think it wouldn't make too much sense to be submissive just in the bedroom, or to be submissive just for domestic reasons. Or in any other environment. I believe in the global FLR, reaching every singe angle of the relationship. Every single angle she wishes to reach.