31 March 2017

Fuck it . . .

I can't quite process *this*, I can't shake images from my head that have crept in.  I can't seem to escape the conversation we had only a few hours before. 

The "what if's" torture the mind.  What if I had known. What if I could have done something. What if I didn't do enough. 

Fuck you what if's. 

There's lots of things I can't quite process right now. I honestly don't know why life has a way of merrily going along, with lots of wonderful things and lots of positives and then out of nowhere it throws shit at full force.  And the wonderful, it disappears as quickly as it started!

Fuck it!

I spent this morning at an emergency specialist appointment for my son, no waiting for normal referrals here.  As if he hasn't had enough battling with his health in his life, it seems as if other issues are creeping in now too.

Fuck life!

Fuck the what if's, fuck it. Fuck you life!

Fuck it all!!!!!


  1. Hugs, Kat.

    I hope some good things will find you soon, too.

    Take care.

    1. Thank you Fur, I really appreciate your wishes.

      Best, Kat

  2. Dear Kat, let it out!

    Knowing you, you probably have about a dozen blog entries written about how you're feeling about lots of things but haven't put them out there as yet.

    Life really can throw it's shit at people, usually those who least deserve it. I know I am hours away from you, but if you fancy lunch, if you fancy an ear, I'd be there in a flash, just so you know that life isn't full of assholes and shit.

    Yours, as always, A x

    1. Dear A,

      Yes, I have a dozen and some. Things I'm still really trying to process and some feelings and thoughts that I just am not ready to put out there.

      Life can be shit yes, and so can people.

      Thank you for the kind offer, I may very well take you up on that one!

      Best, Kat